Realigning with natural timing

As a chronic overthinker and perfectionist, I often find myself inadvertently missing the natural timings of life. It seems that somewhere deep down, I’ve felt like time is an infinite endless resource, and that there will always be an opportunity to go back and complete things later. This sense has led me to be careless with time, often being late or delaying the start of certain tasks believing that there will always be time.

And it’s not just the timing of physical actions; it’s also in the timing of my emotional responses. It’s often like my reactions are on a delay. Emotions come, but sometimes a beat too late, missing the natural flow of the moment. When I should speak up, I hesitate. When I should let go, I hold on too long… often leading to an odd kind of awkwardness in my interactions.

Whatever my intention is – these missed beats are communicating something: hesitation, ambivalence, uncertainty. Though internally I see it as a moment to collect my thoughts, to the outside world it can look like a lack of conviction, a lack of care, or even disregard. This becomes especially apparent in my relationships. In my social life I sometimes find myself holding back my true feelings out of a fear of causing hurt. But that hesitation, that delay, ends up creating more uncertainty and more suffering.

So how do I get back in tune with the natural flow? I can reflect on the lessons from Tai Chi where the goal is to “make mind and body as one.” It is exactly a practice of being present, allowing body and energy to naturally flow from the center without overthinking each movement. When the body and mind move together, there is harmony. In Tai Chi, I’ve learned to physically move with the natural energy that’s already present, not forcing or resisting. So why don’t I take that lesson and apply it to all the other aspects of my life? Now is the time!

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